Painful Cry At Midnight

Just within one night, I learn a new world, something new about life perhaps.
I was sitting up straight on my chair, in my room, at my hostel, forcing my eyes to bulge wide, reviving my brain to not shut down and ensuring my hands are on the move in scribbling down all the cis-trans isomers, trying hard to appreciate the aroma of ORGANIC CHEMISTRY, no, it still tastes bitter even though I just walked out from the exam hall at 12 noon. The bitter part of it? I had not enough sleep and the mechanisms are dreadful to be remembered. But yes also, I didn't work hard enough pun lah. =P

There I was, all stressed up, as my mood swang from thinking of my Langkawi and China trip with family and friends to the fact that I forgot all my chemistry facts, aih cham ar!

All of the sudden, I heard of someone loud, real LOUD, I was unsure, separated by a door and the concrete walls of the corridor, what caught my ear was a seemingly weeping laughter? Weird indeed, and I just treated it as another of my hostel mates' midnight pillow talk, perhaps sharing of a funny tale that triggers them to laugh out loud. So, I ignored the outside world and continue memorizing while ling is sleeping, sorry ling, i bo off the glaring lights :(

But then, the laughter persisted, sounding more like a moan than laugh. I have to check. As I twist the door knob and push the door aside, I found that Siti and her roommate are also out from their rooms, awaken by the weird sound too. The truth scared me, shocked me to be exact. The kak next door to mine, her brother passed away and the weird laugh I thought earlier on is actually cries and shouts of agony! Foolish me. And this is my first encounter of someone who cried so loudly as this kak loses her beloved youngest brother due to a road accident. Her face was red, sulky, wet as tears are still rolling non-stop down her cheeks, yes, rolling like a sheet of never ending toilet roll being pulled at one end, not dripping as discrete droplets. She shouted, screamed in pain, anger and grief to go home right away, to take a bus immediately, not realizing how dangerous it was, for her, a girl to travel through states alone in a midnight bus. Imagine what if one of my family member leaves me forever, I can't imagine further, I dislike the feeling of separation, eternal separation some more, I don't want that, I can't bear that!

My life is a bliss as compared, what more do I greed for?
Once again, this reminds me to be thankful of whatever I have.
Thanks, for everything I have.

Not Supposed To

When u're mentally alert,
but ur body directs u to the bed, even in broad day light.

When u plan all the seemingly achievable and successful targets,
but none is neither heeded nor hit.

When ur alarm which is set to ring at wee hours really rings mad like a loudspeaker,
but u casually snooze it a gazillion times while lying on bed.

When u know that time is ticking away,
but u still procrastinate.

When u know that watching dramas eats up a few hours of ur study schedule,
but u still turn the tv on and lie like a queen on the couch.

When u're suppose to read up the electronic notes from the power point slides,
but ur itchy hands and curiosity direct u to log into facebook.

All THESE happen to me, right now, when finals is just NEXT WEEK -.-iii

Are u the same too?
If YES, faster stick ur eyes back to that dictionary-thick notes!

Am tired too

When the limit u set is crossed,
When the time u spare others exceeds what is left for urself,
When things u're doing are not within ur responsibilities,
When errands u're running for is far from being convenient,
Think again,
Are others relying too much on u?
Are others over dependent on u?
And why it is always u?

This is the time when u hope that others can understand the fact that u can be tired too.

Going home soon.
Once more, home is indeed the best.
And family is where u can lean and rest on.
Mum & Dad,
I'm coming back..<3

Saying this, to u (:

To this liangzai brother of mine (see I call u handsome =P),
MR. NG WUA JZUI!
Hey, stay cheerful (especially when u're eating, that HUGE smile when u see food), stay tall (without that tummy, cut it off =P), stay fair, stay loud, and stay young boyboy!

HAPPI-i-i-i-ee 12th Birthda-a-a-y aie!

To miss irene (our pretty stpm maths teacher),
Miss Irene,
It's your big day, stay happy and stay pretty teacher!
"Like a rainbow, let's go!"
Happy Birthday miss irene!! n.n

To blackbeltjiejie,
Tian,
Just see ur post on msn.
Stay strong, hold on and get going!
Quiz away and final is here.
Compensate ur lost marks from quiz in finals aite!

To this girl who is still typing on the comp,
Switch to study mode please!
Apa ni? What pharm student lai? So lazy,ISH! Whack on back side!

Bye first.

p/s: H-O-I-K! Gambatte all!

Seven colours.

First there is this glaring noonday sun.

Then there is this swift pouring rain.

When all has ceased,

There is this smell of springy fresh grass,

Droplets of water clinging tight to the tip of leaves,

And this cool cool air sweeping on both cheeks.

As I lift my head up to peep on the sky,

I'm amazed to find a seven-coloured arch,

Yesyes! A rainbow it is!

A beautiful art of nature, with seven colours.

Be responsible

"It's not a matter of an A, a B or a C. It's your responsibilty towards yourself, the society and your patients in future."

What Dr. Yvone Tan just said today smacked me hard on head. It is so true. Even if u don't care what grades u are getting, even if results are unimportant for u, please have a sense of responsibilty towards urself. That, I'm saying to myself.

mtyo, it's time u study, finals is here, u don't want to disappoint ur parents, especially ur dad, do u?

Rice originates from paddy

Yippee!
Current town: Pokok Sena
Status: Having sleep-over tonight in tian's hse.

After all the stress, finally, I get to leave penang! Yay-yay-yay-yay-yay-yaaay! Really need a deep breathe of air outside usm, and the idea of spending my weekend in tian's place really excites me. Although at first I feel slightly scared too cos this is the first time I get to meet tian's family, tian's mummy and daddy, sleep over somemore eh, as an outsider. But now, nope, I was wrong, tian's family is an although noisy (cos filled with daigarjie's shouting =X) but real warm and close-knitted one. Yes, this feeling of togetherness, of a typical chinese family, makes me feel at home, makes me want to go home too, home is so secure and sweet! I'm going to be at home in 5 days time, yesyesyesyesyeshyesh!(n.n)

Today was awesome, good food, good trip, fast driver =P, many shots and warmth from tian's entire family (=

A million xiexie to:
Aunty, tian's lengleng and young mummy: Aunty, xiexieni! U make me feel like in my own house nia, get to eat full full, the duck stew, vege soup and my favourite fish 'gao yu'! yummy!
Uncle, tian's cute daddy: Uncle, ur fruits are really sweet, especially the mangoes, juicy betul! Only get to see u at night cos u work till night, must take care! Reminds me of my dad who works so hard everyday just to give his best in supporting our family. Daddy is always the one who talks least but u know that he cares the most. Showing concern without others knowing indeed heart melting!
Xin-ni, xin-zhao, xin-huan & xin-er: U all got same style when talking de haha, although all different xing ge, next time we go sing k again yea n.n
Tian's lengleng Jiuma and shuaishuai Jiujiu: Aunty and uncle, thanks for everything! for fetching us even when it's raining so heavily, ur handmade sandwiches prepared early in the morning, ur laichi juice, ur cosy third floor of the house which is occupied entirely just by me and tian =D

Last but not least, miss-Oonartian!: sapo blackbeltjiejie! xiexie ni for bringing me back, my first trip to kedah, awesomee-memorably-wonderfully-GREAT! real shuang to go back with u! cham liao u, maybe have to bring an extra me next time when u go bac liao =P

Cham, shall complete pharmaco lab report now, I know I know, tmr due date, sheesh.

To yomayyin who is having her finals tmr: mong-zhu-ngan,rmb to rest, u're not a robot, do ur best will do, dun study till become sasa! I pray hard hard for u!

Gambatte yomayyin!! Hoik-yea! <3