From Suet Li, on 'Teaching in Malaysia'.
It somehow reminds me of you, ceciliating. You'll be one great educator too I'm sure. (:
" today, i went into my weakest and most challenging class to teach them simple adjectives like sizes, colours, and shapes. thirty minutes into the class, even with a lot of activities and drawing and colouring, my kids got me very frustrated for not knowing words like big, small, long, short. So I did something irrational after i realized that it's been almost four months of school and they still haven't learned anything! these 25 kids need serious help. so i put them into groups based on where they live, and came up with 6 groups of 4-5 kids each. I told them that from now on, they'll have extra class with me after school/at night and i'll make sure they attend, even if it means i'll have to get them and send them back.
i immediately regretted doing that. am i out of my mind?? here i am, struggling with everything as it is, and i have no idea if i am mentally or physically capable of pushing so far. they live pretty far away and some live quite deep into the villages, about 30 mins from where i live. but i remember Rakis, my orang asli kid's face and the conversation i had with him yesterday. he used to be a really happy kid, but the past few months he's been very sullen and angry all the time. he said it's cause he can't understand anything, and i can't give my attention to him cos everyone else is crying for help/running around beating people. rakis needs help, and i'm at my wits' end as to how to help him.
so i started with him and a few of my weakest but less misbehaving boys. i got them from their village and it was nice to see them waiting for me by the roadside in the darkness, with their backpacks and jeans and best shirt and eager smile. we had a very productive night reading peter and jane and reviewing stuff learned in school. this pic is of rakis reading with utmost concentration, and he was SUPER focused the entire time i just wanted to hug him and tell him that he's doing great.
when i sent them back, we listened to hitz fm and had a karaoke session in the car (mostly me singing haha). they were bickering about what was the singer singing, "cikgu itu "happy" kan?" "bukanlah "here" lah!" "bukan lah "him" lah!" (the word was "hero" but that's beside the point). then, i met some of their parents. some were nonchalant and didn't care where their kid was, some were very appreciative. but they all had one similarity: they all came from homes that are very not conducive to learning. dilapidated, noisy, dirty..
i drove home drained from the long day but i could still hear their voices in my car. it's defining moments like this that made me realize that they're worth pushing myself for, even if i have to start from scratch, from peter and jane book 1a."
Friday, April 20, 2012
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Dearest you.
Our friendship meant a lot to me. Thus, the continuous messages despite the anticipated one word reply or many a times, the absence of reply. Only to realise, u gave up recently. How ironically, it is true that I lacked observational skills, for if I have realised from the first moment, I shall not leave it so, leaving in my own world of happiness, forgetting that like all other kinds of love in this world, friendship needs nurturing.
Our memories, I'll keep and cherish, for those are my happiest moments in uni.
Sorry for all the disappointments that I have overlooked and the absence of companion when u needed most. The pain u bear is trully not healable by just this simple word, thus the action of sealing off gradually but I trully am sorry. Dont get me wrong, no forcing or pleading for anything in return, as if such act haunts u with all the unhappy moments and disappointments again, I rather not do so.
Just want you to know, our friendship still meant a lot to me. After all, no one has ever occupy my big head and heart this heavily. Although you always call me stupid bird, I still think I have a big brain na. Bluek! =')
You have my support always despite earthquakes, world shakes or whatever not. For your studies, your dream, your loves, your life. Whenever you turn back, there's always my big big smile for you! =')
Our memories, I'll keep and cherish, for those are my happiest moments in uni.
Sorry for all the disappointments that I have overlooked and the absence of companion when u needed most. The pain u bear is trully not healable by just this simple word, thus the action of sealing off gradually but I trully am sorry. Dont get me wrong, no forcing or pleading for anything in return, as if such act haunts u with all the unhappy moments and disappointments again, I rather not do so.
Just want you to know, our friendship still meant a lot to me. After all, no one has ever occupy my big head and heart this heavily. Although you always call me stupid bird, I still think I have a big brain na. Bluek! =')
You have my support always despite earthquakes, world shakes or whatever not. For your studies, your dream, your loves, your life. Whenever you turn back, there's always my big big smile for you! =')
Monday, March 26, 2012
Mixed up.
The reddish estee lauder box I had at home is already full. That's where I keep all handwritten notes by people dear to me. Today, I received yet another note from you, note on a striking pink paper, properly cut into a burger shape, mysteriously wrapped within a blue self made envelope, and sealed with a sticker. Here comes the sudden gush of warm liquid in my eyes again. You discussed with your mummy, discussed with sinyin just to share with me your happiness. You probably wouldn't know, you treated me best among my friends. My guardian angel in USM, who is even younger than me by a year. Everytime I'm sick and tired of life, you're the one who motivates me not to lose faith. My xiaopengyou. =')
'Haha, yea, I'm a Virgo indeed.' That's how I replied when Dr Amin abruptly raised a question as we're arranging for the next class and a night replacement class.
And I'm obviously much darker than the rest of the Chinese in class, even Prof Habibah realised that.
Monday, here goes week 6 of my 6th semester.
'Haha, yea, I'm a Virgo indeed.' That's how I replied when Dr Amin abruptly raised a question as we're arranging for the next class and a night replacement class.
And I'm obviously much darker than the rest of the Chinese in class, even Prof Habibah realised that.
Monday, here goes week 6 of my 6th semester.
Thursday, March 15, 2012
As pretty.
They used to say there's always a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow, and that there's always rainbow after the rain.
I remember how I like rainbows, not realising it exists in pairs until my Form 3 Science teacher once told me.
I remember how precious rainbows are, short lived yet stunning enough for u to anticipate the next one u'll ever see.
From the car window as dad drove along the highway, from the corridor as all of us secondary girls rushed out to peep.
Rainbows, they're pretty yet hard to catch and keep.
I wonder when's the next rainbow I'll see.
Can clouds and blue sky be as pretty?
I remember how I like rainbows, not realising it exists in pairs until my Form 3 Science teacher once told me.
I remember how precious rainbows are, short lived yet stunning enough for u to anticipate the next one u'll ever see.
From the car window as dad drove along the highway, from the corridor as all of us secondary girls rushed out to peep.
Rainbows, they're pretty yet hard to catch and keep.
I wonder when's the next rainbow I'll see.
Can clouds and blue sky be as pretty?
Sunday, December 11, 2011
They are all coming!
Doing assignments backed by Leehom's songs make me crave of Leehom's concert.
Can't wait for March. Hahaha :D
The upcoming half year shall be happening. Wee~
More workloads, more responsibilities but nevertheless more vacations and more craze!
Love beibei's quote: Work hard, play hard, love hard, date hard. Me too greed for all. <3
遇强愈强，越挫越勇，努力！
Christmas is near, dongzhi is near, year end is near, new year is near, chinese new year is near. Warmest part of the year. <3
Can't wait for March. Hahaha :D
The upcoming half year shall be happening. Wee~
More workloads, more responsibilities but nevertheless more vacations and more craze!
Love beibei's quote: Work hard, play hard, love hard, date hard. Me too greed for all. <3
遇强愈强，越挫越勇，努力！
Christmas is near, dongzhi is near, year end is near, new year is near, chinese new year is near. Warmest part of the year. <3
Monday, December 5, 2011
Boo.
Clumsy me. Luckily it still lies untouched on the table. Wanted to clean the whiteboard for Prof Yuen as well but I forgot that unbooked lecture halls are all locked.
I find peace by walking, intermittenly staring at the moon, imagining and allowing my mind to drift away.
At this point, I felt like layers of thin shacky woods being compressed just to form a solid looking plywood.
Sometimes, it's ok to feel weak, be weak. Let loose of being strong.
It shall be a tough week.
Cheer up!
Yangmeiting.
I find peace by walking, intermittenly staring at the moon, imagining and allowing my mind to drift away.
At this point, I felt like layers of thin shacky woods being compressed just to form a solid looking plywood.
Sometimes, it's ok to feel weak, be weak. Let loose of being strong.
It shall be a tough week.
Cheer up!
Yangmeiting.
Thursday, December 1, 2011
Live.Learn.Love.Laugh. :D
This is the one semester I've ever felt so full.
Life recently has been so demanding.
I started off all stressed out, even tiny fluctuations voids me of the motivation to persist.
There's never learning through an easy way but would you opt for an easy alternative given that u'll have to sacrifice learning? I will not even if I have foreseen all of this.
It makes you feel at peace realising people around are still helpful in this once thought selfish world.
Prof Munavvar,
I remember how u helped me in my first meet up with Pn Yoong, recognising the fear in freshie me, taking the trouble to gesture Pn Yoong out from a meeting despite all others in the general office who stared blankly and returned to their office mundane.
I remember how ur smile warmed one of my Tuesday morning, backed by the soft music from that radio in ur room.
And also ur text, asking me not to play out in the rain. I wanted to tell u I'm safely indoor attending Jazzband concert. <3
Prof Zaini,
I remember how u always answered my calls, calling me Mei Ting, initiating the same first question on what problems I'm facing.
I remember how u patiently answered my multiple calls in one single morning just to answer my silly doubts while completing my practical report.
U're always so ready in helping, I want to hold such positivity in life too! Determined* =')
Dr Imran,
From that one serious looking, monotonous, demanding, unfriendly Pakistanist Postgraduate whom Dr Azmi forced us to seek help from to complete our research in 1st Year, I grew liking u as I get to know u more.
U make me realise how important in life that we ought to be serious at work and naughtily play when it comes to play.
U're still as demanding but approachable. I like approaching u after the long hours of class at 5pm to listen how u struggled through life, reaching a lecturer's position today and how u'll continue struggling.
I remember how walking beside u makes me feel short.
I remember how enthusiastic u were while showing me ur first book publication in progress with that cropped body of urs in ur personally designed front cover. I remember how u laughed out loud when I claimed that photo of urs for not being represantable enough because ur legs are much longer! HAHAHAHA.
I remember how I ever had my first walk back to hostel along with a lecturer!
U inspire me to do better even though ure long winded sometimes :P
Mr Mehdi,
Despite the fact that ure no longer teaching us in 3rd year, I held strong impression on u.
I remember how I bumped into u several times this semester whenever I'm lost in searching for lecturers.
I remember how I stupidly answered that I'm not against marrying a foreigner. As if there is a possibility in life that I would even have a male foreigner as my close friend. SzeYing and Frank Lampard's marriage photo popped out! HAHAHAHA. XD
I remember how I bumped into u again early in the morning, realising that u actually walked for 30 minutes already from home. And I sometimes panted just to rush from Aman to school!! Hahaha.
I wanted to tell u sir, ure one of the tens other lecturers during first year whom I payed full attention to during lecture.
U're too cute to resist, the way u talk, the way u stand when lecturing, the way u view things in life, the way u find all others cute as well.
I want to live as happy as u! (=
It's an hour already since I shockly woke at 2am just now. I'm not reaching half the notes of my Friday's Quiz my goodness! HAHAHAHA.
I think i'll just nap before going to school later.
I'm positive to continue! Wooh~
A supportive family, my cute ahpa, my demanding mum but best mum ever, my ikanbilis eyed youngest sis who is like a gangster sometimes XD, my nagging second sis, my polite dajie, my chubby couple of nieces, my ahma, my 3 muskateers, jzim, jzen, jzui.
MrTan. <3
A group of supportive close friends. SzeYing. <3 angrybirdowl and that stylish architecture-to-be. XD
A missed roommate who updated me time to time. Angelicpig hahaha!
And a few ever helful lecturers in school.
You're my inspiration to move on.
When the going gets tough, the tough gets going.
Life, I'm loving it.
Palapapapa!
I shall start off revision with fresh smelling rows of teeth! High Ten!
Life recently has been so demanding.
I started off all stressed out, even tiny fluctuations voids me of the motivation to persist.
There's never learning through an easy way but would you opt for an easy alternative given that u'll have to sacrifice learning? I will not even if I have foreseen all of this.
It makes you feel at peace realising people around are still helpful in this once thought selfish world.
Prof Munavvar,
I remember how u helped me in my first meet up with Pn Yoong, recognising the fear in freshie me, taking the trouble to gesture Pn Yoong out from a meeting despite all others in the general office who stared blankly and returned to their office mundane.
I remember how ur smile warmed one of my Tuesday morning, backed by the soft music from that radio in ur room.
And also ur text, asking me not to play out in the rain. I wanted to tell u I'm safely indoor attending Jazzband concert. <3
Prof Zaini,
I remember how u always answered my calls, calling me Mei Ting, initiating the same first question on what problems I'm facing.
I remember how u patiently answered my multiple calls in one single morning just to answer my silly doubts while completing my practical report.
U're always so ready in helping, I want to hold such positivity in life too! Determined* =')
Dr Imran,
From that one serious looking, monotonous, demanding, unfriendly Pakistanist Postgraduate whom Dr Azmi forced us to seek help from to complete our research in 1st Year, I grew liking u as I get to know u more.
U make me realise how important in life that we ought to be serious at work and naughtily play when it comes to play.
U're still as demanding but approachable. I like approaching u after the long hours of class at 5pm to listen how u struggled through life, reaching a lecturer's position today and how u'll continue struggling.
I remember how walking beside u makes me feel short.
I remember how enthusiastic u were while showing me ur first book publication in progress with that cropped body of urs in ur personally designed front cover. I remember how u laughed out loud when I claimed that photo of urs for not being represantable enough because ur legs are much longer! HAHAHAHA.
I remember how I ever had my first walk back to hostel along with a lecturer!
U inspire me to do better even though ure long winded sometimes :P
Mr Mehdi,
Despite the fact that ure no longer teaching us in 3rd year, I held strong impression on u.
I remember how I bumped into u several times this semester whenever I'm lost in searching for lecturers.
I remember how I stupidly answered that I'm not against marrying a foreigner. As if there is a possibility in life that I would even have a male foreigner as my close friend. SzeYing and Frank Lampard's marriage photo popped out! HAHAHAHA. XD
I remember how I bumped into u again early in the morning, realising that u actually walked for 30 minutes already from home. And I sometimes panted just to rush from Aman to school!! Hahaha.
I wanted to tell u sir, ure one of the tens other lecturers during first year whom I payed full attention to during lecture.
U're too cute to resist, the way u talk, the way u stand when lecturing, the way u view things in life, the way u find all others cute as well.
I want to live as happy as u! (=
It's an hour already since I shockly woke at 2am just now. I'm not reaching half the notes of my Friday's Quiz my goodness! HAHAHAHA.
I think i'll just nap before going to school later.
I'm positive to continue! Wooh~
A supportive family, my cute ahpa, my demanding mum but best mum ever, my ikanbilis eyed youngest sis who is like a gangster sometimes XD, my nagging second sis, my polite dajie, my chubby couple of nieces, my ahma, my 3 muskateers, jzim, jzen, jzui.
MrTan. <3
A group of supportive close friends. SzeYing. <3 angrybirdowl and that stylish architecture-to-be. XD
A missed roommate who updated me time to time. Angelicpig hahaha!
And a few ever helful lecturers in school.
You're my inspiration to move on.
When the going gets tough, the tough gets going.
Life, I'm loving it.
Palapapapa!
I shall start off revision with fresh smelling rows of teeth! High Ten!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)